Sunday, August 24, 2008

vbac in the saddle again.

If I hadn't fired my doctor, I would be holding my baby right now. Did I mention that? That I fired my doctor? I did.

It amazes me that people have such strong opinions about what someone else wants to do with her body parts (particularly those parts), so I've kept my big mouth shut about my VBAC plans. I'm going to try to do things the old fashioned way, because I know myself. I know that if I didn't try, I would always wonder and probably regret not trying. I don't judge you if you opted for a second c-section. I just knew I couldn't schedule one. I need to wait until he is ready to come.

I spent too much of this pregnancy full of fear, trying to make this decision apart from the stories and statistics. Lately, I'm too big to care what people think. In the end, it's a lot like bringing a baby into the world. You take this leap. You make the best decision you can for your family without really knowing how it's all going to turn out. Maybe you go off of your birth control pill or IUD or whatever. Maybe you find out one day that you're pregnant when you weren't planning to be at all. You say, "we're going to do this," even if you feel like you can't. Even if it means you have to wear ice packs in your underwear afterward. I know it really doesn't matter how my babies come out of me, only that they come out. Still, I have to try, I'll let you know how it goes.

I'll leave comments open this time, but only if you promise to be nice.

*Just yesterday, Hollie Miller, maker of meals and other wonderful things took this picture and many more of my big, round self. I'm going to post some of the shots this week. If you're local and need a photographer, she takes amazing photos and I'll gladly connect you with her.

20 comments:

Chopper Nate said...

that's my girl.

momaof4 said...

You amaze me.
GO for it girl..I'm not really sure I told anyone my plans about a VBAC. It will go just fine.

I can't wait to bring some dinners for that little guy. and the big guy and that little cutie too! And you too Miss.

mcmom said...

I'm so excited for you guys. You have been on my mind so much lately.

Alida said...

I love pictures of pregnant women!!
Such beauty, such strength, so much life and love.

What a lucky little guy to have such a great family. Much love and luck to you.

B. Barker said...

Go VBAC, go! I'm so proud of you. I'm cheering for you and all your "parts" to function as God designed them.

[Did you know that we had a home waterbirth with #2?]

ang said...

I hope he comes out exactly as you want, I don't see any reason why he won't. I just want to see a picture of that lovely new baby boy... soon, soon. :)

Hosmerita said...

I sooo can't believe that you aren't having a C-section! ANd seriously what was up with the food last year? (Insert realization that I am so totally being a sarcastic brat!)

You go Mamma!
Your old dock was just envious that she wasn't as cool as you are! Yay for the midwife that will help you through. I know that you are in good hands with God. If you are supposed to have a VBAC you will, if you aren't you wont.

Lovin the belly photos, lovin you!

cmhd said...

You're going to be great. I love the smile. It oozes so much confidence, the c-section will have no choice but to stay away. :)

Anonymous said...

I am so stoked for you! you are going to do awesome!
kat

Anonymous said...

You look amazing and beautiful! I can't wait to see more phots....and to hear all about your vbac! So come on baby - lets meet you!

Kristin

the mama said...

seriously... who would leave a nasty comment about you having a VBAC?!

you're gonna rock this. you'll do great and so will the little man.

Anonymous said...

You are awesome Kar! I think you will do great and you know we are all VBac'in ya! Ha-Ha... OK so many people might not know my humor(I am a Herman after all!) You are great! And the ice-pack in the undies.... you aren't missing much! But hey.... if you want that to make your experience complete....I think I have a couple in one of my bathroom drawers. Love ya girl-friend! Can't wait for his arrival.
Can I just say that Hollie is a great photographer? WOW! Very very cute!
T

Team Johnston said...

We are excited to hear about the arrival of this little guy. Allyson & Thomas helped me pick out the pattern and yarn for his blanket and hat.
~Danielle :)

Holly said...

Holy crap, you weren't kidding about the belly. That's awesome!!

Joshua & Valerie said...

Ditto. Ditto. I feel the same way. We ARE missing something. More than a sore...you-know-what and ended with with so much more than we bargained for. Walking into the hospital over two years ago, anticipating a natural, unmedicated vaginal birth...I had no idea the phyical and emotional toll that is associated with a c-section.

The physical pain is intense and long lasting. The emotional pain is overwhelming and still healing. At least for me. To tell you the truth, preparing for my own VBAC has helped me to attack the "c-section demons" I've lived with all this time, some that were even repressed. I don't expect anyone who hasn't had a similar experience to understand. (If you were planning your first as a natural birth and all the joys and details that entail it and ended up with a a surgical birth and all the sorrows and hurt that entail it, then you probably at least sympathize, if not empathize.)

I still haven't written on my blog about my experiences with my c-section or my preparations for a VBAC. Soon. I'm not sure if I'm quite ready yet. (I think I may use part of what I just wrote in it!)

Thanks for blazing this VBAC trail before me.

Praying for you. For strength, for endurance, for a joyous birth, for health for you and your baby. And for peace. Peace, regardless of how this birth ends up going!

Joshua & Valerie said...

Oh, and I love the a la natural pic! I took prego pics...but just a tad too early (I got much bigger the last 2 plus weeks of my pregnancy!) I, too, too pics of bare belly. There's just something incredible about the whole thing. Why not document the belly!

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